Monday, January 7, 2008

Drama queen alert.

Blogging through exhaustion.. I don't know how smart that is, but I have a lot on my mind.

This has been a fantastic Christmas break, but starting tomorrow it will be officially over. Back to work I go- teaching kids how to act and teaching even more kids how to sing. It's a great job actually.

Lately I've been realizing the value of friendships. I desire friendships that are loyal and loving. I think sometimes things get so routine that we forget how to love people. Everyone. I am learning more and more everyday about how to love people.

Also, after 2 1/2 months I am facing the harsh reality that the boy has in fact moved on. I haven't. Why?? He has someone else and I ruined any possibility of anything. It's my fault and yet I can't get over being mad at myself. I used to say that I'd rather be mad at myself than someone else, but all my life I've taken the blame for so much, I am tired of carrying this weight. When will I learn to not repeat my mistakes? It's hard to forgive yourself.

In all other news... I had a fun night out with Lynzy & Danielle the other night.

I just crave some solidity in my life.

I need to refocus and prepare for my Senior Recital.


.... I hate feeling alone.

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